I will be the first to admit that I am painfully optimistic to a fault. I am more than a glass-half-full kinda person. The glass is not just half full, but it was given to you FOR FREE and its full of diamonds. DIAMONDS!!! Or at the very least some strawberry-watermelon Nerds. Mmmm…
This is problematic. You see, when you are THAT stinking optimistic, anything is possible. Well, that’s not true. You THINK anything is possible. You will ATTEMPT to do anything, and it usually results in some kind of monumental cluster-fuck. (For example, my poorly received Advent Calendar). My enthusiasm knows no bounds. My GREAT ideas are perpetually causing my loved ones all kinds of ulcers and late night fits of anxiety-induced diarrhea.
But, hey, what can ya do?
Anyway, this become glaringly obvious to me this fine morning when I skipped outside in my normal happy-go-lucky-blithering-idiot-la-dee-dah fashion. I came face to face with Gilbert, our newly adopted Heinz 57. He is a wonderful beast with many redeeming qualities, but intelligence isn’t one of them. His enthusiasm and optimism though, I can relate to. Every time he sees you he will search frantically around on the ground for an offering. Any twig, leaf or dried grass will suffice. Then he will come barrelling at you with a full body wag to offer you his treasure.
Here is Gilbert offering me his most prized possession in the universe:
You have to forgive the nauseating sucky voice but that’s how you are supposed to talk to dogs, OK! Its their mother tongue I tell ya.
On this particular morning, however, it wasn’t a leaf or a twig I was offered. It was garbage. And what did I spy but the remnants of an entire garbage bag that had been shredded and exuberantly tossed around the yard. A technicolor dream show of refuse. Nice work, Gilbert. But then I looked down at his big brown eyes and what did I spy?
Yes, none other than a Hidden Valley Ranch bottle. That immediately reminded me of this:
And suddenly I was laughing and happy-go-lucky again. Oh Gilbert, you wonderful beast. Thanks for the chuckle this morning. See, even a disasterous garbage explosion has its perks.
PS – Things have improved on the Advent Calendar front. My oldest asked me if I would do the same kind of advent calendar again next year. OHHHHH YEAAAAAAAAH!!!!
PPS – The worst thing you can give a chronic optimist is ENCOURAGEMENT 🙂