Feral Five: 5 Times My Kids Humbled Me

5. Upon noticing that I remove my bra when getting ready for bed: “Mama, why do you take your boobs off at night?”

4. Remarking on the color of my teeth: “It looks like you chewed a green glow stick”. 

3. Loudly in a quiet public venue “Let me see you pig bites. LET ME SEE YOUR PIG BIIIIIITES!!!!!!!” (You know you are a farmer when you actually have pig bites). 

2. Remarking on my impressive size: “Mommy is the big boy one.”

1. Demanding during diaper change: “Show me your penis.” “Mommy is a girl. I don’t have a penis.” “Ohhhhhhh. Show me your big mommy penis?”


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